


You're my downfall

by lovewido



Category: The Walking Dead & Related Fandoms, The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Angst, Crying, Fluff, M/M, Smut, handjob, relationship, virgin!Daryl
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-25
Updated: 2018-07-25
Packaged: 2019-06-16 07:55:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,438
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15432477
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lovewido/pseuds/lovewido
Summary: Daryl being a virgin and socially awkward, does not know how to deal with Rick Grimes in their relationship, which leads to uncomfortable discoveries and some dark thoughts for Daryl. Luckily for him, Rick is very patient and is there to kiss it all better!





	You're my downfall

**Author's Note:**

> So my friend asked me to write a story for her, so i asked her about what and this was what she wanted:   
> Rick x Daryl, virgin Daryl, unsocial Daryl, 'Like Norman described him'. So, I said to her i'll write 1000 words for you and come back later  
> And here we are with 2400 words lol.   
> anyway, first time for me to work from Daryl's POV, so i was not used to write from his pov and especially not this angsty part of him ahaha. So i hope it turns out to be alright, even though I was pretty tired while writing this and don't know how good it actually is, lol.   
> Hope you guys enjoy this none the less!! 
> 
> xx

It had been a month since Rick had blurted out his feelings towards him. He remembered that faithful night, when he had come back from a run completely covered in walker blood. For him it had been just walker blood, but the way Rick spotted him, caught his eyes like he was the only person who mattered and rushed over, had been quite a weird thought. He had tensed when Rick laid a hand on him and batted him away in response and Rick’s eyes had been full of worry. 

After he got thoroughly checked by the younger man, the man had let go an explosive breath, as if he had been holding his breath all this time. And he couldn’t understand why Rick was so worried about him. Who cared about a damn Dixon anyway? Okay, maybe the only reason for Rick to act that way was because he brought food in and they were.. friends? But Rick sounded so fragile when he said that he had been scared and he thought that he lost him. He had looked awkwardly at the man, because.. what? 

He’d never received love, but the way Rick looked at him, with those damn puppy eyes. He’d knew from the way a blush crept up to his face and the way he felt like he was high up in the clouds that he had fallen in love with this man. But who didn’t, with those pretty blue eyes he could just drown into. 

So he had started to admire Rick from far away, because the last thing he wanted to do was fuck up the only thing he cared about and that was this whole group that they had here, Glenn, Carl, lil’ asskicker, Rick. So he had pushed it all away, because no person would fall in love with a Dixon anyway. 

But Rick started to act weird, started to come close to him as soon as he was able to and sometimes he just looked at him with those blue eyes. The only thing he could do was grunt or shrug whenever Rick tried to talk to him though, ignoring the way his face lit up as he saw Rick smiling to him. He swore he could melt away right there and then, but he would blame it to the burning sun if anyone asked.

After that he had washed himself from the walker’s blood and guts, he had walked up to lil’ asskicker, gently lifting her from the cradle he had made with the beautiful name of this beautiful girl. Even though Rick tried to stop him from calling her lil’ asskicker, for him she would always be a lil’ asskicker, taking after her dad. Who was the biggest asskicker he knew. “Hey there lil’ asskicker.” He cooed softly as soon as he knew that there was no-one nearby to hear him speak to the little girl. 

She was gorgeous and from the moment Maggie walked out of the prison, crying, with the little girl in her arms, he knew he would do anything in the world for this girl. Especially when Rick couldn’t. “I heard ya had some troubles sleepin’ huh? What ya fussin’ ‘bout?” he said with a soft smile on his face. It was ridiculous, if anyone would see this. Because he never talked that much and especially not in that tone to anyone, but lil’ asskicker here didn’t judge him, lil’ asskicker just looked at him with her beautiful blue eyes, reaching up with her little arms towards him. 

“Ya daddy needs to sleep ya know. Ya can’t keep wakin’ him up. He needs his beauty sleep ya know.” He said with a small snort to the little girl, who looked at him with a big smile on her face. She wouldn’t understand him anyway, he knew that, but he couldn’t help himself. “Ya gonna end up just as pretty as yer dad, y’know? I’ll gotta fight all the boys off to stay away from my lil’ girl.” He softly mumbled to her with a smile, placing a soft kiss against her head. Because she wasn’t just Rick’s, she was family, like the whole group. 

“As pretty as her dad huh?” He froze immediately at those words, the southern drawl on his voice so clear. He could feel the blush on his face, burning like his embarrassment on his face, creeping up to his neck. He just grunted, placing her gently back to her crib. “Sorry.” Had been the only thing he said, before he turned around and wanted to walk away from the man, away from the cell that suddenly felt so small and so confining. It was pressing against his chest, making it uncomfortable for him to breathe. He fucked up. He fucked up royally. Rick was going to hate him, was going to kick him out, because he was gay and gay wasn’t right. Gay was bad, gay had to beaten out of you. 

But Rick blocked his way, standing in the opening of the cell and it’s only way out at the same time. Rick was going to beat him. He could win easily from Rick, but he deserved this, he deserved to be beaten by Rick because he had said that Rick was pretty. He had said that Rick was pretty and that was indecent. So he ducked his head, looking down at the floor while he sucked his bottom lip in, his face still red from the embarrassment he felt on his face. 

He was going to let it wash all over him, from the moment Rick lifted his head he closed his eyes, waiting for that punch to land somewhere in his face, to wait for the pain. But the only thing that he got was a pair of soft lips against his own, a hand at the back of his neck with the fingers playing with his growing hair. His eyes shot open and before he knew it he pushed the man away. His eyes big and panicky, because no way, no freaking way that Rick fucking Grimes just kissed him voluntarily. But he did, he did kiss him voluntarily. After that kiss a full wave of words had come out of Rick’s mouth, words that he couldn’t even say again. The only thing he could do was bite on the nail of his thumb until it bled and stare down at the floor. 

That brought them eventually to the point that he was in Rick’s bed, a month later. Sleeping here had become a regular thing, Rick’s excuse being that he soothed Judith, even if he spoiled her too much by letting her sleep between them, which left him with nothing but a small bit of bed left for himself to lay on. But Rick had given her to Beth, easing back into the bed and gently touching him from behind. He could feel his cheeks burning, because he always felt so damn awkward whenever Rick touched him. He never even dared to take off his shirt, his back filled with scars. 

Even with them being in this... ‘relationship’ for a month, the only things that they had done were kissing, loads of kissing. It would start with Rick’s puppy blue eyes asking him if he could and the only thing he could respond to that was with a short nod. Kissing Rick had been awkward, clumsy, to the point where Rick had looked at him, surprised, but asked no questions. 

Rick’s hands were softly running over his front, while Rick’s nose was at the back of his neck, placing those soft gentle kisses. And with the way Rick’s hands were exploring the front of his body, he started to feel the strain against his pants. Rick would probably think he was weird, because who wouldn’t think he was? He was trash, didn’t belong here in Rick’s cell, didn’t belong here with lil’ asskicker. He should move back to his perch, while he still could. 

“I love you.” Rick mumbled against the back of his neck, stopping to stroke his body and just pulling him close to him. He couldn’t help but swallow thickly, unable to say anything back, so he just grunted. Fuck, did he really just grunt to the words ‘I love you’? He was pathetic. He wasn’t made for Rick, who wanted to touch him all the time, tell him the ‘I love you’s’ and show him off to the world. Or, well, the rest of the world. Which he wasn’t ready for, maybe not ever. 

“I love the way you talk to Jude..” Rick mumbled against his bare skin, “I love the way you get all flushed for me.” Oh my god, this couldn’t be true, fuck. That couldn’t be Rick’s boner against his ass. Why? He wasn’t attractive at all, he wasn’t pretty, he wasn’t nice and from all the things, he was a damn man. Rick couldn’t mean this, fuck. He turned around, but he wasn’t sure if that would make things better, because shit, Rick looked at him with those puppy eyes and with the words spoken in his eyes as well. Rick Grimes loved him and eyes didn’t lie. “’m a guy..” Rick huffed a soft laugh, placing a gentle kiss on his lips. “I know, Daryl.” He softly said to him, placing his hand against his burning cheek. He thought it couldn’t get any warmer than this, but apparently, that was possible. 

“And yer a guy...” he softly said, trying to get through that thick skull of his. “I know, Daryl.” He said again with a soft smile. “I love you.” He met Rick’s eyes again, nothing in there seemed like he was lying and that made his face even more burn. He ducked his head slowly and leaned forward towards Rick, letting his forehead touch the soft lips. That was probably the closest to saying ‘I love you’ for now. 

And then he met Rick’s lighten up eyes, as if he just saw lil’ asskicker cooing to him to come near her and hold her. Rick met his lips again, slow and loving. He was still clumsy, even through all the kisses he had shared with this man. Teeth clacking, either way too much or way too less tongue, but Rick seemed to enjoy their kisses none the less. 

And then the kiss started to get slightly more intense, but he found that he craved for that bit of intenseness. That he wanted Rick to deepen into something more. He didn’t know what to do with his hands, fuck what should he do with his hands? They were just clamping around Rick’s shoulders, they weren’t doing anything. Fuck, must be awkward for Rick, he should get someone more experienced. There wasn’t anything fun about this for him right? Even if he enjoyed it- oh fuck. Oh fuck, Rick’s hand is on his crotch. Oh god, no. What should he do? Should he put his hand on his crotch as well? Fuck, he didn’t know what to do, fuck, fuck. 

So out of panic he just did, placing his palm against the bulge in Rick’s pants and gently pressing against it, earning a soft groan from the younger man. That was good right? Fuck that must be good. So he gently gave a bit more pressure before releasing the pressure, earning another low groan into his mouth, hand on his neck tightening just that little bit. Oh fuck, oh fuck. Rick started to palm him through his pants and he could only squirm and trying to hold back his moans. He tried to focus himself on Rick’s bulge but. 

Oh god, he was going to come, fuck he was going to come. No way, this was way too early. And then Rick’s hand sneaked under his waistline and touch the bare skin himself. And dear god, there was no way he couldn’t come from that. He barely even touched it, but his body started to shake just that tiny bit as his muscles tightened at release and moaning into Rick’s mouth.. Oh fuck, he was way too early. Rick was nowhere close to coming, he fucked up. Again, fuck he fucked up. He pulled away from the kiss with tears in his eyes as Rick pulled his hand out of his trousers to look at his hand. “Did you just-“ He didn’t know how quick he had to turn himself around to bite back the tears. See, he couldn’t even pleasure Rick before he had come, they hadn’t even done anything yet! Fuck, fuck. Rick was going to laugh into his face about it, laugh at him because he was a virgin. 

“Hey.. Daryl..” The only thing he could get out as a respond was a broken off sob, which was never meant for Rick to hear in the first place. “Oh, Daryl, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have pushed you..” Rick softly said, gently stroking his side with his hand which wasn’t coated with Daryl’s come. “But it’s okay, It doesn’t matter to me..” Rick lied down next to him and he heard some wiping off, before an arm draped over him, pulling him close and back to the position they had started in in the first place. Rick’s mouth against the back of his neck, his arm keeping him close. “I’m sorry.” He said with a light sob in his voice, dammit, if that didn’t sound damn weak he didn’t know what would sound weak. “I’m sorry, Rick, I gotta help-“ He said as he tried to turn himself around, but Rick kept him in place. 

See, now he didn’t even want him to satisfy him, to pleasure him. “None of that, it’s okay darlin’. You’ve had quite enough of this for now.” Rick mumbled against his neck, nuzzling against it with his nose. What? What was that for bullshit, he could still.. he could still touch Rick’s dick.. right? “But ya-“ Rick softly bit him, which made him shut up almost immediately. “It’s okay, we’ll get to that point later.” Rick said and he was pretty sure he could feel the younger man smirking against the back of his neck. “I’m goin’ to take things slow with you, okay? You don’t have to do anythin’ you don’t feel comfortable with. Like right now. We can build this up at the rate you want this darlin’.” He swallowed thickly, but it was clear that nothing was going to happen anymore like this. Not for today if he had to believe Rick, which he kind of did. 


End file.
